i got 2 beautiful messages from friends of mine that i haven’t seen in a very long time.
i’ve made contact with them through facebook again, and both have spotted on it that i have come out. “a” told me that she had meant to write for a while, but that she was happy for me, and realized i must have gone through a tough time lately. from her comments, i thought she had read the blog, but i’m sure not…
“i”, in germany, was here a few years ago, and shared my apartment with me. we had a real connection, and i think she was falling for me. while i really liked her, it is the first time i was aware that i didn’t want to break her heart, and i came so so close to telling her that i thought i was gay. we took a few walks on camps bay beach in the evenings, and had wonderful chats. but i didn’t tell her. she was upset and didn’t understand me (little did she know that i didn’t understand myself either), and was quite hurt byt the time she left. i think one of my last comments was that maybe one day she would understand why i couldn’t commit to anything with her. and then i went inside myself, and buried it all even deeper. for another good 7 years or so.
and now we found each other through a mutual friend on facebook, and she sent me the most wonderful message, that she is so glad, and that so much makes sense now, after the hurt of losing this friendship. and that she sends me a huge hug. i have obviously para-phrased here, but it made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. thank you “i”.
i so love my motorbike… whizzing past the standing-still-traffic, keeping my eyes peeled for those that don’t look before they change lanes, and keeping my fuel bill low. makes me smile J
what bugged me today: bad service in the supermarket
what i learnt today: that insurance companies are probably colluding… otherwise how would a different company know my current premium? mmmhhh
what i am grateful for: planning a holiday – no matter how short – and how exciting that can be!